Richard Tarnas makes a remark in his Cosmos and Psyche: ”Accompanying the more profound occurrences of synchronicity was a dawning intuition …… that the individual was herself or himself not only embedded in a larger ground of meaning and purpose, but also in some sense (is) a focus of it."
" What happened in the past is dependent on what is to happen in the future." Paul Davies, Other Worlds
The past is prologue. Norman O. Brown.
"Somebody said that it couldn't be done, at least no one ever has done it."
IN 1932, Los Angeles hosted the Olympic game, that's the year I was born. Then 52 years later, Los Angeles hosted the Olympic games in July 31-August 11, 1984. A few weeks before the games opened this incident happened: I was sewing, the television was on but I wasn't listening to it until suddenly I heard the words: "The second world is here and in the second world all the rules are changed." as though the volume of the television had been turned up. I looked at the television. It was an advertisement for a new automobile, the Infiniti I believe. "How ridiculous!" I thought to myself. "Advertisements don't have to make sense. A 'new world' in a new car?", then I went back to my sewing and my thinking, (which had been about a few unusual events that had recently happened in a square dance group we belonged to.)
But the words in the advertisement didn't leave my thought. They began to be regenerated, re-occurring for no reason I could see for several days. Then over a span of time that I can't be certain about I noticed that memories of a few incidents that had happened in the past year came to mind along with those words in the automobile advertisement.
(One incident came to mind but a few others followed it: I had met the man who had bought our house a few years ago. He was so changed that I barely recognized him. He had looked at me and said something that made me feel confused: "You've gone through re-birth haven't you?" I didn't answer or ask what he meant. He'd had plans when he bought our house, to marry his girlfriend, have a baby and live happily in the house after turning it into a duplex, so they could afford the house. Everything went as he'd planned until he had been caught in the tenants' bed. His wife divorced him and would not let him see his child. He was grief stricken and genuinely in anguish.
He was skeletally thin, but so was I. It takes one to know one?
"You've gone through re-birth, haven't you?" was vaguely associated in my thought with those unusually well timed events. I had begun to wonder if I was thinking some of my own thought content before this string of events happened. A kind of thought that was new to me had begun, it addressed me as though it was spoken by some other person. The events had happened and I'd barely thought about them until a few accumulated. It was the timing that marked them as unusual.
Several incidents now puzzled me because they were retrieved and batched along with the strange fact that I'd not thought about them after each event happened. Now the words in the advertisement seemed to link up with those few events which had been unlike anything I'd ever experienced before. The words 'The second world is here and in the second world all the rules are changed.' and those events were inked up in my mind. Very gradually I began to sense that I was in a 'second world where all the rules are changed."
I'd had a neurological test done because I believed I'd had brain damage. Everything seemed different but when I looked carefully, nothing looked different. The tests resulted in my being told my handedness had changed from right to left. I found I could write in reverse with my left hand as fluently as I could with my right hand. My mind was different, my body felt wretched; I wasn't sleeping at all; I couldn't remember what I read; I was getting lost when I went to familiar places. At night lights seemed eyelike, pinpoints of light that were just lights when I looked carefully. I looked carefully.
It was not easy to realize that a kind of self observation had begun: I was seeing my own body as though I was audience as well as an actor in my life. The change was in my mind obviously, was subtle and it overlaid everything for a several years after 1984.
Less than a year later I was working at Boeing when a line from a poem I'd memorized after reading it only twice when I was in high school began to haunt me, re-occurring in my mind as I went about my job. "At least no one ever has done it." linked up eventually with an idea that had begun to lurk in my mind in the late 1970's.
My mind had produced a thought assembled from two books I'd read. In Thornton Wilders' The Bridge of San Luis Rey there's a conversation in a chapter titled, Perhaps An Intention in which an old abbess made a remark that had caused me to pause over it when I read it the first time. It's on page 137, "..and the insane? How do they treat them now? I watch them sometimes and it seems to me there is a secret about it, just out of sight, just around the corner....."
I remember thinking this was an odd question, it seemed out of context and somehow unusual to insert in the conversation.
The other book was Arthur C. Clarke's Childhood's End which I'd read when it came out. It had affected me in a way that no other book I've ever read has done. This time when I re-read Childhood's End, I felt again the effect it had on me originally. Several unusual situations developed when I was re-reading Childhood's End: I noticed that at a certain point I read a sentence on page 181, in the chapter titled The Last Generation but had omitted one word. Then noticing the omission, I paused to wonder why I had not read that word!
That sentence is embedded in a chapter titled The Last Generation in a paragraph that is a part of a conversation between an alien and a man that stowed away on a spaceship and is on the aliens' planet. The alien speaks: "All through that century the human race was drawing slowly nearer to the abyss never even suspecting it's existence. Across that abyss, there is only one bridge. Few ....... unaided have ever found it. Some have turned back while there was still time, avoiding both the danger and the achievement. That would never have been your fate or your fortune. Your race was too vital for that. It would have plunged into ruin and taken others with it, for you would never have found the bridge."
Then I noticed that I had not read what was on the page which was: "Few races unaided have ever found it." I'd read 'Few unaided have ever found it." Why was the word 'races' omitted? Somehow I could not read the word 'races' in that one sentence! I was more puzzled by why I wondered to myself about this not too unusual fact, I scan read usually.
It was then I felt a faint sense that within my mind there was another reader, a presence of some kind behind my own eyes. It had been faintly sensed as I'd read, I'd felt it as a sense of a 'poised, waiting, even searching' eye, expecting something and it had recognized what it was looking for in this material: "...it is an abyss across which few....unaided have ever found their way."
But somehow the word 'races' was not part of what it recognized. I was watching my mind at work, without knowing consciously that at the moment my attention had been re-focused to a new world, my inner world. In that world, thought of a new kind had been scrolling through my mind for nearly 2 years, about a dream I'd had.
The television had never seemed to say something that made me think about my life, until this incident happened. Why was my attention suddenly shifted, at just that moment in Time? Just exactly at the point when I was thinking about a few unusual events that had happened in the past few months? Other incidents had happened that now were joined together and I was slightly curious finally, watching what I had given no attention to before: the content in my mind.